Birmingham’s botch job criminals – bungling crooks whose masterplans backfired

Sadly some criminals are good at what they do and can make precarious ‘careers’ from breaking the law, but others are not. Considering the high stakes involved it is remarkable how often sheer incompetence leads to offenders being caught and then convicted.

Equally bizarre is that many still deny their actions even when the evidence is stacked against them. Below we have rounded up recent cases which have passed through our courts in Birmingham and the Black Country where those in the dock can very fairly be described as ‘bungling’.

And we are not talking about petty crooks either as our list includes ‘hitmen’, robbers and a white supremacist hell-bent on a race war. Thankfully, their own ineptitude led to their downfall.

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£100k murder plotters jailed for hiring ‘Tesco jacket’ hitman in bungled shooting

Connor Palmer, Craig Miller and Elijah Stokes were involved in a botched attempt to murder someone in Birmingham. A drug dealer based in Dubai ordered a £100,000 hit on the victim who supposedly owed him money.

His ‘loyal and trusted’ Midlands-based lieutenant Stokes introduced him to ‘professional hitmen’ Connor Palmer and Craig Miller. They subcontracted the hit to another person who carried out the eventual shooting, but bungled the job.

The shooter, who remains unidentified, turned up at the target’s home in Sheldon in March 2020 wearing a ski mask, Tesco jacket and a hi-vis. He opened fire and struck the victim with five bullets before fleeing the scene.

But the target managed to scramble from the hallway to the living room and has miraculously gone on to make a full recovery. The plot was blown open by detectives when an international investigation busted the EncroChat network which had been used by criminals across the world to communicate secretly.

Palmer, 40, from London, Miller, 37, from Surrey and Stokes, 38, from Coventry, were convicted of conspiracy to murder while Miller was found guilty of a second identical count for agreeing to kill another man, which he never did. Palmer was sentenced to life with a minimum of 23 years while Miller was sentenced to life with a minimum of 30 years. Stokes received a determinate sentence of 27 years, of which he will serve two thirds in custody.

‘Show me how it works’ – Bumbling car-jackers couldn’t start electric vehicle

Owen Morris, Richard Rocheta and Kudzai Magure attempted two car-jackings in a matter of minutes – but were caught when they could not figure out how to start an electric vehicle. They managed to steal a Citroen in Handsworth shortly before 6am, on May 18, 2022, striking the owner on the hand and back with a metal pole in the process.

But the trio, wearing balaclavas, abandoned the vehicle and targeted a second victim on his driveway in Great Barr. He had a knife pointed to his head and was ordered to show them how the electric vehicle worked. Ultimately the gang was forced to flee on foot. They were all arrested shortly after.

All three admitted robbery and attempted robbery. Rocheta, aged 24, of Scholars Close, Handsworth, and Morris, 21, of Perry Wood Road, Great Barr were sentenced to three years each. Magure, 23, of Scholars Close, Handsworth, received three years and seven months.

Right wing fanatic’s ‘bad idea’ kitchen experiment that ended in ‘fireball’

White supremacist Vaughn Dolphin carried out an experiment mixing chemicals which nearly blew up his kitchen. The 20-year-old comically filmed the aftermath describing the ‘awesome fireball’ whilst admitting it was a ‘bad idea’.

Dolphin, from Walsall, was caught in possession of a number illegal documents on a USB stick in June last year. They included a ‘Big Book of Mischief’ and ‘Anarchist’s Cookbook’ as well as manuals on how to make weapons. He had also filmed himself wearing body armour with Nazi inspired ‘SS’ logos on and communicated with fellow Hitler enthusiasts on encrypted messaging app Telegram.

Police also seized a homemade gun barrel and the ingredients to make gun powder. Dolphin, of Walsall Wood Road, Aldridge, was convicted of a number of terror offences. He was sentenced to eight years and six months in a young offenders institution.

Killer boasted about stabbing teen to death in rap lyrics

Unlike others on this list Abdirahaman Yussuf tragically carried out what he intended to do, but his crucial failure led to him being caught. He stabbed 18-year-old Yahya Sharif to death in Small Heath in December 2021 but police later found rap lyrics he had written boasting about the killing.

The victim was getting out of a BMW on Coventry Road when he was ambushed by a group of men, including Yussuf. The 19-year-old of Hob Moor Road, Yardley, was arrested several months later in London.

Police found the handwritten rap lyrics hidden in an envelope in his sock and a court heard Yussuf was on the verge of signing a contract with Sony. It remains unclear what the motive for the killing was. He was found guilty of murder and sentenced to life with a minimum of 22 years.

Bungling Post Office robbers who made off with empty cash box

Bungling robbers Demiah Logan and Jerome Duncan stole a cash box, but it contained no money at all. They targeted a security officer at a post office on Trinity Street in Smethwick in January this year, but he had already stored £45,000 in his van.

Duncan approached, grabbed him by the throat and pushed him into some shelves before taking the cash box completely unaware that it was empty. He and accomplice Logan escaped in a Ford Focus which was tracked on CCTV.

Duncan, 29, of no fixed address, and Logan, 25, of Borrowdale Road, Northfield, pleaded guilty to robbery and were each sentenced to two years. Their plan was described as a ‘bad job and a bad decision’.

Bungling burglar attempts to break into woman’s home twice in two days and fails

Peter Swali tried to break into a pensioner’s home in Shard End twice in as many days – but failed on both occasions. He was disturbed on the first try only to come back 24 hours later.

As he drove away on the second time CCTV captured him leaving in a Volkswagen Golf which was identified by police a few hours later. He fled officers who brought him to an abrupt halt with a stinger, only for the 23-year-old to jump in the back seat. Ridiculously, he claimed he was an innocent passenger who had been picked up by someone else who had ran off.

Swali, of Yardley Green Road, Bordseley Green, was found guilty of aggravated attempted burglary and attempted burglary. He was sentenced to eight years and three months.

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