Tinnitus from pub gig made life unbearable for retired fireman who committed suicide

There was an instant attraction when Linda Mitchell met Glen, a former firefighter, in a North London pub in 1998.

They were both living locally, and Linda fell for his wicked sense of humour and the fact that the ex-emergency services worker was rather easy on the eye.

‘When Glen was in his early 40s, he retired as a firefighter because of a knee injury,’ explains Linda, 48. ‘His pension meant he didn’t need to work again but he studied and found new jobs. He basically just enjoyed himself.’

The couple, who married in 1999, loved seeing live bands together. And in April 2011, on Easter Sunday, they went to a pub gig. What should have been a great night turned out to be the start of a horrific journey they could never have predicted would end in such tragedy.

‘Everyone knows that feeling when you walk out at the end of a gig with a bit of fuzziness in your ears – it’s usually gone when you wake up,’ says Linda. ‘But this particular night the volume was so loud it hurt, so we left early.’

In the morning, Linda felt OK, but Glen still had pain and ringing in his ears. He rang the GP but couldn’t get an appointment for more than a week. So the couple googled his symptoms and everything pointed to tinnitus, where the symptom is hearing a noise – such as ringing or buzzing – which isn’t caused by an outside source.

Glen was working in a Royal Mail sorting office at the time but he struggled so much with the noise that he had to sign off sick. By the following weekend he was in so much distress that Linda took him to Northampton General Hospital’s out-of-hours clinic. It was so loud he couldn’t bear it, so they made an appointment for the next day.

‘By then he was terrified that this painful squealing would never end,’ recalls Linda. But the doctor said it probably was tinnitus and assured Glen it would go in a few days. ‘It didn’t, and he also had fluttering sensations that felt like bugs flying in his head. He couldn’t sleep and paced the streets at 3am trying to exhaust himself.

‘“Will it ever go away?” he said to me. “Will I never hear quiet again?” After two more weeks of suffering, he said, “If this is what life is going to be like, I’m going to end it.”

Hearing him talk like this made Linda panic. She took him to the GP’s surgery and demanded an emergency appointment. ‘We wanted to see an audiologist but the GP said Glen would have to take a hearing test first – another two weeks away! He was just broken.’

By this time the couple were in separate rooms because Glen didn’t want his tossing and turning to disturb Linda.

At 9am, she went in with a coffee and found Glen barely conscious. He was lying on the bed with empty pill packets on the floor, so she called an ambulance.

It was too late for a stomach pump and the paramedics prepared her for the worst – Glen would probably die. But later that evening he began to murmur and Linda felt hopeful he’d pull through.

‘All I could think was, “Please let this have reset his brain.” You know how when a computer goes wrong so you turn it off and on again? I hoped the shock of what had happened would make the noise go away.

‘But when he came to, the noises were still there. “Why didn’t you let me die?” he asked.

‘He was prescribed medication to help him sleep and a glimmer of the old Glen returned. He got an audiology appointment a week later and an explanation of what could be done.

‘He was given ear devices that generate white noise to trick the brain to focus on something else and was told to give them time to take effect.’ Glen went back to work, but if there was a loud noise he’d have to go home. He stayed in and got anxious and depressed.

The tinnitus got worse and developed into hyperacusis, oversensitivity to everyday sounds. Linda desperately encouraged him to follow a normal life, like the doctors advised, but it felt like she was constantly bullying him.

Poor Glen’s medication was changed in June and the new drug only made his tinnitus and anxiety worse. He had a referral to the mental health crisis team but everything was taking so long.

‘At an appointment in July 2011, the GP said he just had to wait. I saw the light going out in Glen’s eyes. I wanted to scream, “Can’t you see he’s suicidal?” But I couldn’t bring myself to say the words out loud.

‘A day later I came home from work to find Glen quite upbeat. It was his 53rd birthday in two days’ time and he said he’d arranged to stay with a mate and have a night out. I was suspicious that he might try to take his own life but he said. “You’re always telling me to get out and enjoy myself. That’s all I’m doing.”

‘In the end, I decided to believe him. I went to work the next day and when he called we chatted normally. But he didn’t answer any of my texts after that. I suspected what he’d done, so I spoke to his friend.

‘It was clear Glen had never planned anything with him. The next day there were officers waiting for me when I got home from work. “He’s dead, isn’t he?” I said.’

Linda’s fears were tragically correct. Glen had been found in a Northampton hotel that morning. He’d left a note and later the coroner ruled he’d taken his own life.

‘I know Glen didn’t want to die. He just wanted to leave the hell of tinnitus behind,’ insists Linda.

Since the tragedy, Linda now works full-time for Deafconnect, a charity in Northamptonshire, supporting people with hearing problems. Tinnitus affects more than seven million people in the UK and at least 850,000 of them have the same life-destroying symptoms as Glen.

‘We campaign to raise awareness and encourage doctors and the people responsible for research funding to take the condition more seriously,’ she explains.

‘I miss Glen every day. At first I couldn’t bear to listen to the music we liked. He loved Pink Floyd and it was only last year that I got brave enough to see a local show about the band. Not having him there broke my heart. I lost our past with him because it hurt so much to do those things – and I lost our future too.’

Tinnitus: Common symptoms and where to get help

– Tinnitus is the name for hearing a sound in one ear, both ears or in the head that doesn’t come from an external source.

– It can be linked to hearing loss caused by normal ageing or exposure to loud noise. But it can be a symptom of other ear conditions too. See your GP if you think you have it.

– Sounds can include hissing, sizzling, buzzing, whooshing and white noise. There may be a single sound or more. It may be there all the time, or come and go.

– People of all ages suffer but it’s more common in older adults. Many have tinnitus for a short time, for example after listening to loud music or when they have congestion because of a cold.

– Around one in eight people in the UK live with tinnitus, and one in 10 of those will have life-debilitating symptoms.

– To contact the Action On Hearing Loss Tinnitus Helpline , phone 0808 808 6666 or email tinnitushelpline@hearingloss.org.uk. Alternatively, to visit the British Tinnitus Association website CLICK HERE

– If you are having problems or want to talk to someone anonymously, you can call The Samaritans, 24 hours a day, on 116 123.